“Our Nation is going to the dogs!”
“There’s nothing good on TV these days!”
“The news is so liberal biased now!”
“There aren’t enough jobs to go around!”
“Higher education is too expensive!”
“My hot pocket is still frozen in the middle!”
Human beings are complainers. We whine and we cry, we bitch and we moan, about EVERYTHING. We complain to our families, our friends, our neighbors and teachers. We complain ABOUT our FRIENDS, FAMILIES, NEIGHBORS, AND TEACHERS. HELL! This blog itself is a complaint about how much we as a race complain, spewed out into cyberspace for all to hear! Everything is wrong, everything is broken! We’ve been so caught up in the bad lately, we’ve forgotten the good. The topics most commonly discussed around the water cooler are about what we lack, what we need, what we think we deserve. We talk about what’s done wrong, why it’s wrong, and how it’s only going to get worse. Why don’t we ever talk about what’s done right?
There’s still good in the world! It’s always happy hour somewhere right? Somewhere a child was born. Somewhere, someone just fell in love. Somewhere, someone is eating a Milky Way candy bar! So, why not dwell, just for a moment, on all that is great. I share with you my friends, a list or all that is still good, right, and true with this world. This is a list of what makes my life worth living, in no particular order. Enjoy!
1: Chocolate
2: The cold side of the pillow
3: Family and friends who love me for me
4: The Value menu, ANY VALUE MENU (Except Arby’s. Seriously guys? Really?)
5: Santa Claus
6: Steven Colbert
7: Singing the Guitar Solo
8: Shark Week
9: Random Dancing in Public Places
10: That one person who laughs when you tell a really bad joke
11: The Budweiser Frogs
12: You know what? Any and all beer commercials are pretty awesome
13: Scott Pilgrim V.S. The World
14: Spellchecker
15: Driving the highway really late at night when the roads are empty
16: Mountain Dew
17: The Platypus
18: Boy Meets World Re-Runs
19: American football
20: Air Guitar
21: The Safety Dance
22: That’s What She Said
23: Hugs
24: Cinnamon Toast Crunch
25: Listening to your new favorite song over and over just to learn the lyrics
26: Rubbing someone’s newly shaved head and making a wish
27: Rain
28: Jesus Sandals
29: Knowing all the words to “ICE ICE BABY”
30: Your favorite pair of jeans
31: Hilary Fullmer (here’s looking at you kid ;) )
32: High Fiving Babies
33: Snow Days
34: The ability to settle any dispute with a game of rock, paper, scissors
35: Any food that requires wet-naps or napkins to eat
36: A healthy colon
37: Any and all additions of Super Smash Brothers
38: Walking through the wall with an extremely attractive friend and having everyone stare out you like they’re amazed you’re together
39: You’re set of wheels from your high school days
40: Doing the moonwalk in your socks on a hardwood floor (or any other smooth surface)
41: When you sneeze and a stranger say’s bless you
42: Finally finding Waldo
43: The moment at a concert when the crowd finally figure’s out what song their playing up there!
44: 11:11
45: Per-diddle
46: Being slobby in a hotel room because you know you don’t have to clean it up
47: Homemade cookies
48: My Mom
49: Your Mom! Oh snap!
50: Finding out someone actually reads your blog other than your mother
And that’s just for starters! There is so much out there that makes life AWESOME! Think about it! Make a list of your own! Post it in my comment box! Do it! I dare, find 50 things that make you smile!
Yours Truly,
The Littlest Blogger
Thursday, October 21, 2010
Saturday, October 16, 2010
Paradox in a box
"Despite your pseudo-bohemian appearance and vaguely leftist doctrine of beliefs, you know NOTHING about art or sex that you couldn't read in any trendy New York underground fashion magazine...Proto-typical non-conformist. You are a vacuous soldier of the thrift store Gestapo. You adhere to a set of standards and tastes that appear to be determined by an unseen panel of hipster judges-BULLSHIT-giving a thumbs up and thumbs down to incoming and outgoing trends and styles of music and art. Go analog baby, you're so post-modern. You're diving face forward into an antiquated past, it's disgusting! It's offensive! Don't stick your nose up at me!"
- Say Anything "Admit It!!"
How many of us know a person like this? How many of us know an individual who wants so bad to be the one to “break the mold” that, instead of reaching said goal, they find themselves thrust into another mold altogether. Instead of becoming the stereotypical jock, they find themselves becoming the stereotypical musician, or they go from being the stereotypical artist to being the stereotypical class president. Human beings want so desperately to be unique, to stand out from the crowd. We want to prove to society that we don't need their approval. But the fact is we crave it. We seek to be different, nay, we force ourselves to fit the molds of what others have defined as "different" or "unique" so society will stroke our egos by telling us how special we really are. We put forth all this effort, just so we can look down all those "no quite as special as I am."
I quote again Say Anything
"When you walk by a group of quote-unquote “normal people” you chuckle to yourself, patting yourself on the back as you scoff. It's the same superiority complex shared by the high school jocks who made your life a living hell, that makes you a slave to the competitive capitalist dogma you spend every moment of your waking life BITCHING about!"
We are a walking talking paradox! We strive to be different, but we're not! We long to be one of a kind, but instead we're just another one in a million begging to be noticed and accepted by our peers. We try to be “the non-conformist” but instead we’re just conforming to someone else’s standards of non-conformity. When are we going to realize you don't have to know the name of every indie band, watch every Tim Burton movie, or pretend to enjoy Donnie Darko to be "hip" or "cool". The thing you can do to most emphasize your uniqueness is be 100% you all the time! We strive to be “cool by the numbers” then constantly tell ourselves we’re the ones coloring outside of the lines, but we can’t deceive ourselves forever. If you truly want to be different, stand up and say “I’m done playing this game!” and carry on with being the real you!
Yours truly,
The Littlest Blogger
- Say Anything "Admit It!!"
How many of us know a person like this? How many of us know an individual who wants so bad to be the one to “break the mold” that, instead of reaching said goal, they find themselves thrust into another mold altogether. Instead of becoming the stereotypical jock, they find themselves becoming the stereotypical musician, or they go from being the stereotypical artist to being the stereotypical class president. Human beings want so desperately to be unique, to stand out from the crowd. We want to prove to society that we don't need their approval. But the fact is we crave it. We seek to be different, nay, we force ourselves to fit the molds of what others have defined as "different" or "unique" so society will stroke our egos by telling us how special we really are. We put forth all this effort, just so we can look down all those "no quite as special as I am."
I quote again Say Anything
"When you walk by a group of quote-unquote “normal people” you chuckle to yourself, patting yourself on the back as you scoff. It's the same superiority complex shared by the high school jocks who made your life a living hell, that makes you a slave to the competitive capitalist dogma you spend every moment of your waking life BITCHING about!"
We are a walking talking paradox! We strive to be different, but we're not! We long to be one of a kind, but instead we're just another one in a million begging to be noticed and accepted by our peers. We try to be “the non-conformist” but instead we’re just conforming to someone else’s standards of non-conformity. When are we going to realize you don't have to know the name of every indie band, watch every Tim Burton movie, or pretend to enjoy Donnie Darko to be "hip" or "cool". The thing you can do to most emphasize your uniqueness is be 100% you all the time! We strive to be “cool by the numbers” then constantly tell ourselves we’re the ones coloring outside of the lines, but we can’t deceive ourselves forever. If you truly want to be different, stand up and say “I’m done playing this game!” and carry on with being the real you!
Yours truly,
The Littlest Blogger
Sunday, October 10, 2010
I Applaud a Herald of Truth!
A few days ago in my philosophy class we were discussing Immanual Kant and his duty ethic, which is centered upon the categorical imperitive. According to Kant, any absolute or universal principle can be defined by two keys: 1) Can I will that the principle behind my actions should become a universal law? 2) Rational beings are never to be used solely as a means to an end. On the surface Kantian ethics appears pretty solid, and that is in many instances true. It is not, however, perfect. Among the several points where this system breaks down is the question of who/what consititutes a rational being? Kant, our proffessor explained, didn't believe women to be rational beings.
Now, as soon as this argument was raised, an uncomfortable silence spread through the room like a whispering spectre, and all the men in the room looked at each other knowingly. At long last a solitary champion exorcized the unwelcome spirit and vanquished the repressive silence by saying what every one of us was thinking:
'Well, women can be pretty irrational sometimes.'
When his comment was rewarded with looks of horror and stares of disbelief, he qualified it with the admission that women are, in fact, quite intelligent. But, as our proffessor so self-righteoursly declared, "There's no digging yourself out of that hole." Not a word was uttered in defense of this brave soul who offered himself as the sacrificial lamb, this yet undeniable truth. Disapproval for making such a bold statement was rendered by men and women alike, as though each of us silently agreed to make our defender of truth the fall guy so we could somehow save face, and deny that all of us - even the women - were tempted to say exactly what he said (in words at least that strong!) As this has been gnawing at me for several days, I'd like to take a minute and record what I wish I'd have had the courage to say:
***
'Okay, no! I refuse to hang this young man out to dry just to look good with the ladies! The man spoke his mind, at great peril to himself, and I say Bravo! How sad it is that at the height of this self-declared age of "reason" we have become so afraid of axioms and generalizations that we fear even the truest of truisms merely because we might just offend the sensitivities of some pour soul! The man has spoken truth today, friends! He admits, as do I, that women (with a few notable exceptions) have the capacity for great thought and achievements of the intellect. But we crucify such a prophet for the mere suggestion that, on occasion, such capacity can be marred or muddled by the intricate emotional faculties of womankind.
'Men, no doubt, often lack a degree of logic and reason behind their actions, I will concede that. I will even concede that women are more likely to look before leaping than are their male counterparts. A lack of logic and reason on man's part, however, denotes only a lack of thought behind the action. In this case, as men we occasionally wave our right (or forget to exercise our right) to think. When we do exercise thought, it's a deliberate, common-sense, experience-based and rational thought proccess which guides our actions. Women more rarely fail to exercise thought entirely, however, their judgement is in constant danger of interference from emotion, reaction, and passion (in lieu of logic or reason). This emotional interference quite often manifests itself in bahavior which is lacking in clearly-visible logic, and therefore appears irrational to much simpler men. While men certainly can and do act out of passion and many women do temper their passion with deliberate logic, the statement that "women can be pretty irrational sometimes" is generally true, and true enough of the time that a broad generalization is not unwarranted.
This in mind, friends, i applaud this herald of truth! Yes, I applaud him though i do so at my own peril, but ladies and gentlemen, even you that reject this axiom of the sometimes irrationality of womankind, you ought to applaud this man just the same. Though we all made him feel small for speaking out, he nevertheless spoke according to his belief, a rare hapenstance which has been tabooed in this postmodern age wherein the only thing worse than being stupid is being "wrong." Take a lesson, friends, from this lad of lads and speak your mind with conviction! Repent for your ostracizing and join me (if indeed there be a scrap of integrity between the lot of you) in a round of applause for this and every martyr whose dignity we have claimed in our own cowardice to take a stand!'
Your's Truly,
The Littlest Blogger
Now, as soon as this argument was raised, an uncomfortable silence spread through the room like a whispering spectre, and all the men in the room looked at each other knowingly. At long last a solitary champion exorcized the unwelcome spirit and vanquished the repressive silence by saying what every one of us was thinking:
'Well, women can be pretty irrational sometimes.'
When his comment was rewarded with looks of horror and stares of disbelief, he qualified it with the admission that women are, in fact, quite intelligent. But, as our proffessor so self-righteoursly declared, "There's no digging yourself out of that hole." Not a word was uttered in defense of this brave soul who offered himself as the sacrificial lamb, this yet undeniable truth. Disapproval for making such a bold statement was rendered by men and women alike, as though each of us silently agreed to make our defender of truth the fall guy so we could somehow save face, and deny that all of us - even the women - were tempted to say exactly what he said (in words at least that strong!) As this has been gnawing at me for several days, I'd like to take a minute and record what I wish I'd have had the courage to say:
***
'Okay, no! I refuse to hang this young man out to dry just to look good with the ladies! The man spoke his mind, at great peril to himself, and I say Bravo! How sad it is that at the height of this self-declared age of "reason" we have become so afraid of axioms and generalizations that we fear even the truest of truisms merely because we might just offend the sensitivities of some pour soul! The man has spoken truth today, friends! He admits, as do I, that women (with a few notable exceptions) have the capacity for great thought and achievements of the intellect. But we crucify such a prophet for the mere suggestion that, on occasion, such capacity can be marred or muddled by the intricate emotional faculties of womankind.
'Men, no doubt, often lack a degree of logic and reason behind their actions, I will concede that. I will even concede that women are more likely to look before leaping than are their male counterparts. A lack of logic and reason on man's part, however, denotes only a lack of thought behind the action. In this case, as men we occasionally wave our right (or forget to exercise our right) to think. When we do exercise thought, it's a deliberate, common-sense, experience-based and rational thought proccess which guides our actions. Women more rarely fail to exercise thought entirely, however, their judgement is in constant danger of interference from emotion, reaction, and passion (in lieu of logic or reason). This emotional interference quite often manifests itself in bahavior which is lacking in clearly-visible logic, and therefore appears irrational to much simpler men. While men certainly can and do act out of passion and many women do temper their passion with deliberate logic, the statement that "women can be pretty irrational sometimes" is generally true, and true enough of the time that a broad generalization is not unwarranted.
This in mind, friends, i applaud this herald of truth! Yes, I applaud him though i do so at my own peril, but ladies and gentlemen, even you that reject this axiom of the sometimes irrationality of womankind, you ought to applaud this man just the same. Though we all made him feel small for speaking out, he nevertheless spoke according to his belief, a rare hapenstance which has been tabooed in this postmodern age wherein the only thing worse than being stupid is being "wrong." Take a lesson, friends, from this lad of lads and speak your mind with conviction! Repent for your ostracizing and join me (if indeed there be a scrap of integrity between the lot of you) in a round of applause for this and every martyr whose dignity we have claimed in our own cowardice to take a stand!'
Your's Truly,
The Littlest Blogger
Sunday, October 3, 2010
The Emperors New Clothes
We all can recall that story told to us as children, of a vain king and a crafty tailor. The king wished to comission the most beautiful and elaborate set of clothes imagineable, and the tailor promised it to him. The king provided the tailor with a small fortune with which to purchase the finest materials to create the ultimate fashion statement. However, greed overcame the tailor, and, instead of using the money to create the kings comissioned masterpiece, he instead pocketed the money, and came up with a plan to deceive the king.
The next day the tailor made his way to the castle, a large bag slung over his shoulder. When the time came to reveal to the king the beautiful garment for which he had spent so much of his gold, the tailor reached into his bag, he pulled out...nothing. He held the nothing aloft in the air for everyone to see.
"This!" he said brandishing the nothingness in his hands "is a robe made of magical cloth! most expensive and rare of all silks! It is only visible to the wisest and strongest men, good king, can you see how beautiful it is? Does this rare and beautiful garment suit you and your glory?" The king could of course, could not see the cloth, because of course, there was nothing there.
"Err..... Yes good tailor! I can see your glorious creation! It's beauty is beyond description! I would be honored to wear such a robe!" and so the king dawned the suit of nothing, and the tailor made his way from the castle, much, much richer.
The king wore the suit for days, flaunting it to his subjects. Insisting on its beauty, telling all that if they could not see it, they were foolsih indeed. One day, the king held a grand parade in his own honor, so that all the kingdom could witness the beauty of his magnificent new clothes. The citizens lined the streets, eager to see the robes that were the talk of the entire kingdom. Finally, the king took to the streets, the citizens of the kingdom could see no robes, but they oooohed, and aaaahed nonetheless, not wishing to appear ignorant, until finally a small child pointed to the king and yelled, "Look there, that idiot is naked!"
The crowd immediately fell silent, and the king angrily turned on the boy, who was laughing unceasingly at the infuriated king. slowly, a roar of laughter spilled through the crowd and soon, all the citizens of the land we're laughing and pointing at the once proud king. The king's face redened as he looked down at his beautiful new clothes, and finally he hung his head in shame. He was indeed naked.
This is a phenomena sweeping the world, we all have been blinded by the desire to feel "smart" or "hip" and have embraced styles and trends and are, in a word, stupid.
Why do so many of us love pop diva Lady Ga Ga? is it because she is wildly talented, beautiful, and ground breakingly original? or is she, infact, just NUTS!?!? We embrace her, because if we stood up and said HEY SHES CRAZY, we would be told that we lack the depth necessary to understand her unique brand of genius. Well, guess what! she's just NAKED, and your are just as stupid as she is! thanks for playing!
Another example of the phenomena at work is the movie "Inception". Thousand's of fans have flocked to movie theaters around the world to view this "Deeply thought provoking film" just to find themselves hours of their wasted lives later, stumbling out of a dark movie theater with a dumbstruck look on their face. Later, among friends, they'll pretend to get the movie, and praise it and all its glory, when in reality, deep down inside, it sill makes absolutely no sense. Why are you still confused? because there is nothing to make sense of! it makes NO sense, and wasn't meant to! you were simply presented with a long drab film that hides its inadequacy behind a mask of "artistic genius"!
I urge you, open your eyes to the naked among you, and don't be afraid to point them out to others! Don't be afraid of looking uncultured or stupid, instead, save others from a plague of rapidly spreading idiocy!
Your Friend,
The littlest Blogger
The next day the tailor made his way to the castle, a large bag slung over his shoulder. When the time came to reveal to the king the beautiful garment for which he had spent so much of his gold, the tailor reached into his bag, he pulled out...nothing. He held the nothing aloft in the air for everyone to see.
"This!" he said brandishing the nothingness in his hands "is a robe made of magical cloth! most expensive and rare of all silks! It is only visible to the wisest and strongest men, good king, can you see how beautiful it is? Does this rare and beautiful garment suit you and your glory?" The king could of course, could not see the cloth, because of course, there was nothing there.
"Err..... Yes good tailor! I can see your glorious creation! It's beauty is beyond description! I would be honored to wear such a robe!" and so the king dawned the suit of nothing, and the tailor made his way from the castle, much, much richer.
The king wore the suit for days, flaunting it to his subjects. Insisting on its beauty, telling all that if they could not see it, they were foolsih indeed. One day, the king held a grand parade in his own honor, so that all the kingdom could witness the beauty of his magnificent new clothes. The citizens lined the streets, eager to see the robes that were the talk of the entire kingdom. Finally, the king took to the streets, the citizens of the kingdom could see no robes, but they oooohed, and aaaahed nonetheless, not wishing to appear ignorant, until finally a small child pointed to the king and yelled, "Look there, that idiot is naked!"
The crowd immediately fell silent, and the king angrily turned on the boy, who was laughing unceasingly at the infuriated king. slowly, a roar of laughter spilled through the crowd and soon, all the citizens of the land we're laughing and pointing at the once proud king. The king's face redened as he looked down at his beautiful new clothes, and finally he hung his head in shame. He was indeed naked.
This is a phenomena sweeping the world, we all have been blinded by the desire to feel "smart" or "hip" and have embraced styles and trends and are, in a word, stupid.
Why do so many of us love pop diva Lady Ga Ga? is it because she is wildly talented, beautiful, and ground breakingly original? or is she, infact, just NUTS!?!? We embrace her, because if we stood up and said HEY SHES CRAZY, we would be told that we lack the depth necessary to understand her unique brand of genius. Well, guess what! she's just NAKED, and your are just as stupid as she is! thanks for playing!
Another example of the phenomena at work is the movie "Inception". Thousand's of fans have flocked to movie theaters around the world to view this "Deeply thought provoking film" just to find themselves hours of their wasted lives later, stumbling out of a dark movie theater with a dumbstruck look on their face. Later, among friends, they'll pretend to get the movie, and praise it and all its glory, when in reality, deep down inside, it sill makes absolutely no sense. Why are you still confused? because there is nothing to make sense of! it makes NO sense, and wasn't meant to! you were simply presented with a long drab film that hides its inadequacy behind a mask of "artistic genius"!
I urge you, open your eyes to the naked among you, and don't be afraid to point them out to others! Don't be afraid of looking uncultured or stupid, instead, save others from a plague of rapidly spreading idiocy!
Your Friend,
The littlest Blogger
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)